Smart, Single & Loves Shoes – Lunch With The Queen


Continued from here.

“I’m not here to cause any trouble.”


Tell that to the girls waiting for you inside who’ve spent months and months tongue lashing you and your relationship with Jide. 

My subconscious is having a swell time, swirling a straw in her freshly home made Mojito. Too early? Oh well.

We head into the house, side by side. I look over at her, I can’t help it. She looks quite relaxed and I bet I look exactly how I feel. Tense and wound up in a bunch of knots. I manage a weak smile. She glances up from typing rapidly on her phone and smiles back at me, the smile a genuine one, reaching all the way to her eyes.

We make our way through the house to the kitchen where I can hear the girls laughing.

Aisha: “Well I just feel like if Buks is really cool with the Ice Queen then I must be a virgin. The bitch must be up to something… Maybe she’s trying to butter Buks up so she can get back in Jide’s bed. Then they’ll have a JJJ… a Jide Junior… Junior.”

She bursts into an hysterical fit of giggles.


I want the ground should swallow me up. I don’t stop to look at Regina, hurting ahead into the kitchen area to meet them and I consider throwing something at Aisha’s head! Why won’t she just shut her mouth! And didn’t I tell Lola that I was on my way? They should have exercised a little more decorum.

Just behind me, Regina hasn’t uttered a word. She’s quiet and I want to look at her face and see if she’s okay. Of course not! Aisha said hurtful things. I shudder as I realize that if I was in there I might have agreed to all what Aisha said and might even have muttered in consent.


What type of a woman am I becoming? Unkind and bashing my fellow woman.

I can’t help myself and as we enter the kitchen I squeak, “AISHA!”

They all turn and look at me in unison. The girls can’t stop gaping at me standing with my hand on my waist with Regina behind me, Aisha has her hands over her mouth in shock and Yeka is looking on, equally as shocked.

We all look over at Regina, she has her phone out in her right hand and she is smiling.


Regina: “Hello.”

She waves.

Yeka looks over at Regina and comes over and stretches out her hand, offering a handshake.

Regina takes the hand and she smiles.

Regina: “Looks like you’re going to pop anytime. Congratulations.”

We hear Aisha scoff in the background. I ignore her.

Lo: “Hello Regina. Do we need to be worried?”

Regina looks over at Lo with understanding etched in her eyes.

Regina: “Just here for the meal Lola.”

We all sit around the table as food is served ignoring the giant elephant in the room.

Aisha is noisily playing with her cutlery. We all ignore her.

“Girl you are working that fedora.”, I say to Yeka. She smiles and adjusts the berry coloured Rag & Bone hat on her head.



“How is JJ?”, Lo asks, always the mother hen in every situation.

Regina: “Oh he is doing great now Lola. Thank you.”

Lola nods politely. Of everyone here I thought she would be the least accommodating to Regina but she’s being so nice and receptive. At least for now .

Me: “It was scary, so scary.”

Regina smiles as she reaches for my hand. This is weird… This is so so weird.

Aisha notices it, as does everyone else in the room, does but doesn’t say a word.

I almost feel like we can have a decent meal with no drama or unnecessary confrontations.  My phone rings; it’s Jide. I smile and excuse myself.

Aisha: “Is that your husband?

I look at her and roll my eyes.

“Say hello for me.”, she adds with an almost innocent smile.

Lord, someone needs to put duct tape over that girl’s mouth.

Me: “Hey babe.”

Jide: “Everything okay babe? Nobody has murdered anybody yet? Are you okay?”

I giggle.

Me: “Oh it’s all good babe, we are all grown ass women. No drama or whatever. How is JJ?”

I keep any eye on table in case I start seeing plates flying or cutlery thrown.

Jide: “JJ is fine babe, he keeps asking for Buks. Told him you were here with him all through the night and he practically blushed.”

Me: “Can I speak to him?”


Jide passes the phone to JJ.

JJ: ” Aunty Buks…”

I smile as my eyes water.

Me: “How are you holding up big man?”

I can just imagine his face beaming up at me.

JJ: “I’m strong and healthy Buks! Daddy said I fought the germs and killed them like an Avenger!”

I laugh and agree enthusiastically.

Me: “Yes you did, and we were all so proud of you!”

JJ: “Are you there with Mummy? Can I speak to her?”

I head over to the dining area and the girls are all sitting quietly, picking at their food and saying nothing to each other.


Me: “Regina, JJ wants speak to you.”

I hand the phone to her.

She beams and almost jumps out off the chair and the legs make a screeching sound against the floor.

Regina: “Hey baby…”

Her eyes begin to well up, and she excuses herself from the table tears fall on her cheeks.

The girls all notice, barely concealing their stares. Aisha watches as Regina she makes her way out of the kitchen.

Me: “Aisha! What was that?”

Aisha sits up straighter in her chair and fiddles with a napkin.

Aisha: “Hell how could I have known that you guys were in the next room? We talk about her like that all the time!”

Lo: “Well she never ever knows or is within earshot.”

Yeka and I nod simultaneously.

Yeka: “Are you going to apologize?”

Aisha picks up her glass, swirling the liquid in it around.

She shrugs.

Aisha: “I don’t know! Gosh you guys need to stop sweating me!”

I roll my eyes.

Lo: “This is a bit weird Buks, I mean it’s Regina…”

Yeka mutters something under her breath.

Regina comes back into the room and she smiles as she hands me my phone. Her cheeks are tear stained.

Me: “Are you okay?”

She takes her seat beside me.

Regina: “He sounds like my JJ again. Oh Buks, what would I do without him? Waking up in the middle of the night, his body so cold.”

She starts crying again and this time Lo reaches for her hand and squeezes it reassuringly.

Lo: “You won’t ever have to go through that again, Lord I can’t even imagine that…”

Yeka places her hand on her bulging stomach.

Regina takes a tissue out of her very cool Coach bag and wipes her nose.



Regina looks over at Lo and smiles as she says thank you.

Regina: “I think I have to be on my way, JJ asked for some things and well, I just miss him.”

She laugh at herself and we all smile in sympathy.

We all stand as she rises.

Aisha: “It’s fine ladies I will walk her out.”

I’m surprised and start to object but Lo signals that I allow her.

Regina: “Bye ladies. Thank you all.”

We all say bye and watch as Aisha leads her out the door. No one says anything for a moment after we sit, waiting for Aisha to return.

Yeka: “You’re sure letting her go was a good idea?”

My thoughts exactly.

Lo: W”hat’s the worst that can happen? I’m sure Aisha is apologizing for her comments.”

I highly doubt that.

Me: “Doubtful.”

Aisha walks back into the room and is smiling.

She sits in her chair, doesn’t say a word and picks up her phone.

Yeka: “If you don’t want this weight on you, you better start talking lady!”

We all echo Yeka with various threats. Aisha starts giggling and she puts her phone down.

Aisha: “Well, let’s just say myself and Ms. Regina are now Instagram buddies.”

She picks up her phone and hands it to Lo. I start laughing.

Me: “So did you apologize?!”

She nods.

Aisha: “Yeah, I did and I told her she shouldn’t try anything funny with you or with bae. She apologized too and asked for my number. And we followed each other on the ‘gram. She has a killer wardrobe.”

We all laugh.

Yeka shrieks.

We all turn to look at her and Lo looks under the table.

Lo: “What is it? Are you having contractions?”

Yeka looks at Lo.

Yeka: “No silly! Buks OMG! Come and see!”

Aisha rushes over to Yeka’s side and grabs the phone from her hand.


I get up and move to her.

Me: “What’s going on?”

She hands me the phone.

My mouth drops wide open, the phone almost slipping from my hand.

Me: “Engaged?”



Continues on Tuesday.


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  1. Haba waited all day yesterday refreshing my phone only to get this short one, am literally crying. Please next Tuesday hurry up already

  2. And this suspense again??? Hmmmmm….. I’m liking Regina already but she better not make me change my mind…


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